One of the things I love about Holland is how you start exerting yourself physically here. Im back to cycling and yesterday (and today) some friends of mine said, and i quote, “Aarabi, haven’t you been eating anything? you look half your size!” 

I mean like WOW dude! And this when Iv been GORGING on chocolate to work off the stress generated by the electromagnetics exam prep – i felt like the damn hunchback of notre dame with the freakin himalaya on my back – all last week – it was the exam week from HEll y’all – you can imagine how much chocolate i ate – i spent 20 euros on it in one week. Honour Bright -and I’m half my size – MUHAHahhahaha  

Also, cycling in Holland really allows me to release the tension and antipathy i’d accumulated, at home, before I came over to Holland.

Here, cycling against the wind is like fighting a huge powerful force who’s PUSHING you away from him harder and harder – throwing in bridges and cobblestones to boot – fighting against this MAGNIFICENT wind, you feel strong. You feel independant and free. You believe in yourself, for some absurd reason, simply because you’re pedalling through the mad wall that’s determined to push you back. And the ride through that wild wind makes me amazingly happy. Biking against the torrent of invisible strength, just the raw grit of having to push through it makes me feel like i’ve won a battle that day. I feel elevated.

There’s also something to be said for the social air of the place. Nobody judges you. You’re just accepted, liked and welcomed for what you are. The change and difference you bring to a group is celebrated as a refreshing new perspective. Isn’t this the kind of environment where the imagination thrives? why am i not surprised i feel so emancipated here in this country.

So why the resentment in me? I think it was because, like many of us, I chose to fight a lot of stereotypes at home. The personality/ideas/life decisions – in-a-square-box syndrome which afflicts the majority of middle class tamil girls today never appealed to me; not because of some vulgarity in its common-ness but because of the lack of ANY sustainable foundation whatsoever on which it is built (so to the trolls – im not judging you, nor am i being high and mighty). By and large (I’m talking majority here and I’m aware there are other exceptions besides me) these girls are expected to graduate as engineers, a teeny tiny percentage may do a masters, all of them get placed in certain software companies and go on to get married and settled. It’s an easy decision and the girls dont have to take any risks, any stress, face any unforseen and unknown circumstances – and they’re safe and happy. But what about thinking beyond that pattern? It’s going to be an interesting society in 30 years if the majority of our population, especially the women, are IT engineers only, dont you think? 

Refusing to be Coy Lady Soft Words and having as much drive as the guys around me drew plenty of criticism and bad love. Adding salt to the wounds, being compared to and being admonished to emulate the very sterotype I was going against the very grain of, rubbed me up the wrong way It was one hell of an interesting few months when I’d come home from university

So the bad blood. But it’s great to be in a place where people enjoy you and love you for you. I love my country and I dont belong anywhere else. But i think the low risk threshold of us Indians need some serious looking at before we can become any world power.

Think about it peeps love y’all!

Cheers and have a great day!!